Top Horror Bitch of the Year: Leah Pipes as Jessica in Sorority Row:

What would a slasher movie be without it’s requisite bitch? For every virginal good girl there must be her opposite number, the yin to her yang. In recent years many under-qualified nouveau 90210 wannabes have attempted to make a name for themselves in the pantheon of horror bad girls by flatly delivering lines in Valley Girl-esque tones and stomping around in stiletto heels. They have tried to place their names beside such luminaries as Wendy in Prom Night, Barb in the original Black Christmas, and Gail Weathers in Scream. They have tried, and they have failed. Miserably. This year there was one actress who took an overstuffed, convoluted, who-dunnit mess of a remake and it worth the price of admission. She came , she saw, and she stole the movie from the bland final girl the way only a good bitch can. Her name is Leah Pipes, also known as Jessica from Sorority Row.

It’s not that she has the best lines (she does), it’s that she knows how to use them. Each one is a weapon of mass comedic destruction aimed at her counterparts and the audience. When she tells the corpse of one of her sorority sisters that she looks awful, she plays the moment to full effect, relishing the fact that Jessica actually means what she’s saying. She’s not trying to be funny; she’s just that big of a bitch. True mean girl snark comes from understanding the character enough to know why she is who she is; it takes more than an eye roll and a half-assed sneer. Bravo, Jessica, bravo. You were the only thing that kept me from asking for my ten bucks back.