There is the Twilight sex toy for women, so why not one for men? Just in time for Halloween the wonderful people who brought us the FleshLight have released, Count Cockula, the Fleshjack with Bite! “Fleshjack” is FleshLight’s line of sex toys that “cater to their gay audience,” however, the products tend to get the same results when used by straight penises. So heterosexual males shoudln’t be alarmed by the shirtless men when they visit the site. Unfortunately the links in this article are not safe for work, so I included the official product description, and a picture below for those of you who shouldn’t click them.

If you’re at work just wait until you get home to order yourself one. It is not worth getting fired over.

Polish up your stake and drive it into this soft, vampire mouth for an orgasm that will wake the living dead. Packing the same punch as the original Fleshjacks but housed in a compact soda can and featuring the exclusive Vampire Fang inner canal texture not found on any other Fleshjack product.