Gory greetings! Welcome to another edition of IT CAME FROM THE MAILBOX, an exciting column where your old pal Brain Hammer reviews whatever random crap the good folks at horroryearbook decide to throw my way.

This time around I got an e-mail from my drunken and shiftless editor Wil, asking me if I would be interested in reviewing a screener that he couldn’t get to play on his laptop. I was leery of sitting through yet another homemade horror flick, but he said that this one had promise. After looking at the cover art provided I had to agree. I thought this flick looked like it had the potential to be pretty cool.

The storyline for THE TREK is pretty simple. A newlywed couple head into the mountains for a honeymoon adventure and are never seen or heard from again. A tabloid news program called Under Investigation does a story on their disappearance and interviews their family and friends. The true story of what happened to the couple is then revealed to the viewer in flashbacks.

Keith and Kim Russell (Brett Hundley & Erin Fleming) were enjoying a weekend frolic in the mountains when they were attacked by a deranged and hideous looking cave woman. Keith manages to fend off her feeble looking attack and somehow kills her by lightly brushing a stick against her head. This causes Kim to yell “You shouldn’t kill!” Then things go from bad to worse when a caveman shows up and decides to take Kim as his new bride. Keith then resorts to a little Leatherface styled face removal and goes after the no good neanderthal looking for revenge.

Creator and director Lola Wallace is responsible for this one. To her credit, THE TREK is impressively brutal and looks decent for a low budget production. The problem with this flick is that the first half of the running time is boring as hell, and the payoff isn’t really there. It doesn’t help that the acting is really bad across the board. The scenes where the couple’s family members are interviewed are unwatchable. It was bad enough the first time around, and becomes torture when they cut back to these retards repeatedly throughout the film. It ruins any tension or suspense that is being created.

The pathetic fight scene between the cave woman and our hero was so weak looking it made me laugh. The cave woman just sort of fumbles towards the dude and he throws really weak looking punches at the camera in return. It proves how difficult staging a fight scene really is. I was impressed by the makeup and gore effects though. Towards the end of this flick there was some juicy splatter that I appreciated. The cave people also looked very cool. I would have rather spent more time with them than the young couple, as they were were both unappealing and bland. The chick looks good in her underwear but can’t act for shit.

I thought this was a decent idea that was executed poorly. It doesn’t help that this premise has already been done to death in other flicks and that the ending is lifted directly from The Hills Have Eyes. You can consider it a homage, or perhaps a rip off. I personally don’t mind a horror flick that lifts elements from the old school classics, but I found this one to be dull and less than satisfying. I got a chuckle out of the fact that the dvd art says “Your quote could be here!” on the back cover. Somehow I doubt this review will provide Waltzing Devil Productions with any blurb worthy material, but here’s a quote for them to consider: “The chick looks good in her underwear…” – Brain Hammer, Horroryearbook.com.

If you want to learn more about THE TREK you can check out www.thetrekmovie.com.

KEEP THE BLOOD FLOWING!!!