WRESTLEMANIAC aka EL MASCARADO MASSACRE 2008 (Unrated) – Written & Directed by Jesse Baget

WRESTLEMANIAC is about an insane wrestler named El Mascarado (Rey Misterio Sr.) who apparently escaped from a loony bin after having 50 lobotomies. El Mascarado hunts down a porn film crew in Mexico and kills them one by one by ripping their faces (masks) off. Yep, 1 brain… yet 50 lobotomies. Go ahead and do the math on that one.

The premise for the film is fun enough, but poorly executed. You would think that having a hulking wrestler chasing porn stars would be somewhat entertaining and yet I was almost bored to tears. The kills, especially the first few, are completely bloodless and off screen. Yikes! And there is a sex scene, but it manages to not be sexy.

To keep us somewhat interested in the film, you at least get to see the most obnoxious character, Alphonse, beaten to a bloody pulp with all of his teeth knocked out. How many teeth can one human possibly have? Again, math people. But somehow this works. Alphonse is played by Adam Huss who is virtually unrecognizable (out of embarrassment I presume). He has done a ton of TV appearances and spots on soap operas. You at least get to see him with his shirt off.

The creepy looking Irwin Keyes from HOUSE OF 1000 CORPSES (looking like Richard Kiel) shows up as a stranger with a warning and Zack Bennett (upcoming KENTUCKY FRIED HORROR SHOW) has a small role as a stoner.

I have no idea what was going on in the head of writer/ director Jesse Baget, but given the strong reliance on his employment of the Ass cam, I can take a wild guess. The old school ways of teens steaming up windshields are thrown out the window in favor of porn stars that constantly run around in ridiculously high heels and somehow manage to get their jean shorts ripped off by a car door!?! I will give him props for one shot though and that would be when the Last Screaming Porn Star Standing tries to hide from the wrestler be crawling into a hole and sitting facing the camera with her legs completely open to avoid being seen. Um, ironically I saw plenty.

I’ll put it this way- I like slashers and the guy I watched this with likes Lucha Libre and we were both bored with the film. But there were a few unintentionally funny moments like the part where the fat guy decides to wrestle El Mascarado in a makeshift ring and continues to mumble about “quadrilaterals.” The best part is when the fat guy is “translating” Spanish, so the audience understands the plot. But…he is getting the translation wrong and the Spanish speaker I was with called him on it. Oh and quadrilateral is English, not Spanish.

Bottom Line: Good for some laughs during a night in with friends, but Lucha Libre and Rey Misterio Sr. fans should pass.

Rating: 4.5/10

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