Hellhole (1985)
aka – Hell Hole
Directed by Pierre De Moro
90 mins

Review by WIL Keiper

Ready? Susan (Judy Landers) and her mom have some papers hidden, and I’m not sure why, but somebody wants them back. That somebody sends Silk (Ray Sharkey) to find out where they’re hidden. He kills Susan’s mother, throws Susan off a roof, but never gets the papers. Good job! But then what do you expect from a guy named Silk?

Fast-Forward: Susan is not dead, she only has amnesia, and with some strings pulled by the guy who wants those papers, she is comitted to Dr. Fletcher’s (Mary Woronov) insane asylum.

First, lets talk about the insane asylum.

1) It’s only for women, so, good start.

2) It’s full of hot women who seem to belong in jail more than an insane asylum. There is one inmate (I mean patient) who looks like a crazy Liza Minnelli and thinks she’s always on stage, but the rest just seem to suffer from the mental-illness of too much lesbian sex and sniffing glue. For example, one girl even mutters the great line while taking a mud bath with another:

“Dr. Fletcher said this would help cure my nymphomania”

Meanwhile Dr. Fletcher is performing “chemical lobotomies”, on the girls who get out of hand with another doctor who resembles porn star Randy West. The thing is Randy West is really, really trying to figure out the benefits and correct procedure of the “chemical lobotomy,” while Dr. Fletcher is using it for some sick “perverted desire. We know this because Dr. Fletcher points it out after she goes too far with one experiment. We also discover that Randy West is impotent, unfortunatly this is something the movie neglects to follow up on.

Meanwhile, that guy still wants his papers, so he not only gives Silk a second chance to get back by posing as an orderly,but he pays him to do it. Didn’t he learn the first time? Oh and one more thing, some woman on the board of directors, the same board of directors as the guy who wants the papers back, has an internal spy, posing as an orderly, who is trying to take down Dr. Fletcher and her evil experiments.

Got it?

Good?

There are a lot of breast, ass, and bush in this film, a huge shower scene, and even a naked girl fight involving a girl who is sleeping with Silk. The only problem with the movie is, that somehow it seems everytime the girl’s get a hold of glue, poppers, or even crystal meth, and are just about to get their freak on, Dr. Fletcher’s goons always interupt and drag them down to Hellhole where they do their evil experiments. Talk about a a few joy kills.

The shit really hits the fan when the first guy posing as the orderly (he was there before Silk was) falls for Susan and she ends up in the hands of Dr. Fletcher. Silk gets involved trying to “scare the amnesia out of her,” then, the guy who wants the papers shows up to kill Silk. I guess he’s not as dumb as I thought or maybe he is, I’m still not sure. Then Randy West throws his third hissy fit when Dr. Fletcher starts burning all their files, and in retaliation he lets the real crazy people out of the dungeon under Hellhole. Everybody dies, I’m sure there is another nude scene somewhere, and Dr. Fletcher winds up getting the last lobotomy and this time it WORKS!!!

The only thing is you never find out where the damn papers are! Maybe they were always where Silk suggested they were in the first place

“Where’d you hide the papers? IN THE SAUCE HUH?”

But we will never know, now will we?