Hostel2.com is now up and running. You can view the Gallery, Trailer, Synopsis, and some other crap. But the fun part is the “Bidding”. You can upload your own picture on the site and have complete strangers “bid” on you. Or you can pull a perv-ilicious move yourself and bid on the selection of people sorted by certain stats like height, body type, hair color, and nationality.

I hate to say it, but their site moves unbearably slow. Every time I want to look at a new section on this damn thing, I must click the “Passport” and wait for it to flip through pages. Every time. Annoying.

But some of the Gallery pictures look promising. Come to think of it, I would like to know why all the actresses are so pretty. And why would a group of pretty girls back pack through Europe when they can take their tops off in Cancun? And how did Heather Matarazzro (Weiner from WELCOME TO THE DOLLHOUSE) get cute? And was Bijou Phillips ever pretty before? Did she give that blowjob in BROWN BUNNY or was it that other indie actress that can’t keep her clothes on? Oh, that’s right. Phillips had sex in BULLY, not BROWN BUNNY. Silly me.

The baddies in HOSTEL II look scary. And by scary, I mean rich and handsome. Eli Roth exclaims, “I’m really happy with the film. It’s really scary, and I have to say, it’s really violent, even for my standards. I also think that in one way it’s going to be what people think, but the film’s so much more than people are expecting.” Really Eli? Really, really?

Roth continues, “I am ‘working’ with the MPAA because we work really well together, we get along great and respect the job each other has to do. Many people like to paint the MPAA as the bad guy, but they are not - not by a longshot. They were totally conscious of you guys and what you are paying to see when you see “HOSTEL Part II” and really worked hard to protect the film’s integrity, which they absolutely did.”

Since when did the MPAA become good people? And close friends of horror directors? Did Lionsgate go to bed with the ratings board and Roth decided to jump in to progress the hot and heavy tickle fest?

Molly Celaschi